Thank you for your interest in Save the Earth, and for your patience!
Before we pass a final verdict on your application, however, we'd like to request a few revisions.
Firstly, while the cause of Jaina's first Echo is fine, two things can't be granted by a single Echo cause - if she were to gain either the sense of guilt that her past self felt over the bombing or the change to her hair, it'd be solid.
Secondly, her pre-incarnated personality section seems to emphasize what Jaina has done rather than what it suggests about her; we'd like to ask a reworking to bring a bit more focus on her personality with facts and evidence in her history as support!
And lastly, while we understand that your concept of her reincarnation keeps her old-fashioned and formal, she comes across as just a bit too much so to quite register as plausible in modern Earth - in the contents of her musing aloud in her network sample, for example.
Once these areas are addressed we'll be right back to you!
REVISION REQUEST
Before we pass a final verdict on your application, however, we'd like to request a few revisions.
Firstly, while the cause of Jaina's first Echo is fine, two things can't be granted by a single Echo cause - if she were to gain either the sense of guilt that her past self felt over the bombing or the change to her hair, it'd be solid.
Secondly, her pre-incarnated personality section seems to emphasize what Jaina has done rather than what it suggests about her; we'd like to ask a reworking to bring a bit more focus on her personality with facts and evidence in her history as support!
And lastly, while we understand that your concept of her reincarnation keeps her old-fashioned and formal, she comes across as just a bit too much so to quite register as plausible in modern Earth - in the contents of her musing aloud in her network sample, for example.
Once these areas are addressed we'll be right back to you!